Professional Celebrity Rock Music Band, sought for tour of Forward Operating Bases in Kuwait and Afghanistan. Musical repertoire should consist of Southern rock, pop rock, post-grunge, and hard rock. At least one member should be recognized as a professional celebrity. The Government will conduct a performance risk assessment based on the quality, relevancy, and recency of the Offeror's past performances as they relate to the probability of successful accomplishment of the required effort. Performers shall be wholesome and adhere to the standards of good taste; profanity, vulgarity, or connotations of sexual depravity and perversion will not be used. Female entertainers shall be displayed in ways not offensive to the host nation. Protective military equipment, such as Kevlar, body armor, and eye and ear protection, will be provided when the group is traveling on rotary or fixed-wing military aircraft. Any criminal conduct, unexcused tardiness, indecency or obscenity, drunkenness, use of narcotics or hallucinatory drugs, or damage to Government property will be grounds for termination of the contract.
I wonder how much the Gov is paying. If it's along the lines of what they pay for screws and widgets, the gig could be a windfall. Wonder if I should send them a demo? :)
I love this line: "Female entertainers shall be displayed in ways not offensive to the host nation." Displayed? Wow. And how is not going to offend the host nation that (in the case of Afghanistan) you're busy blowing up?
I can see that war band is likely going to be a career move for has been bands in the future.